A lot has happened in the last few weeks. I feel that I've grown (at least inside... still very much vertically challenged).
I saw a doctor for my various injuries. Got some things put back into place. It was challenging but I'm happy that I had no panic attack and was quite comfortable with him. This is a huge milestone for me. To have a doctor physical handle me and control my body never went well in the past. Never. Either me or him/her ended up hurt and I usually end up restrained in some way or another. So that was a big step towards vanquishing my demons. It's all for fighting, I need to keep telling myself that I'm letting the doctor touch me to help me heal so I can learn how to fight.
Everything. Is. About. Fighting.
I went to the practice down in Borealis, it was epic. Got two moments where all came together. Two separate instances where my brain decided to understand. One is awesome, two is freaken apogee. I haven't had one of those moments in months.
It's awesome to still be able to learn and understand even without fighting. Although, I still wish I could've fought but.. being mature about this and not even sorry!
In the last few years, I had a good amount of people ask me why I fight. Why I keep going back. Today was a perfect example of why. Some things were taught, some words were exchanged, some lessons were given and aside from the actual fighting bits, I will use everything I've learned today in my everyday life. This is why I fight. For the very selfish reason that it gives me strength to go through everyday things.
Fun is also a big part of it, I admit.
