The shieldmaiden picked up a spear

Vápnum sínum skal-a maðr velli á feti ganga framar.

I'm exhausted, and that's awesome.
When I first starting fighting, I wanted to fight with great weapons. Yes, I like sword fighting and yes I have a shield obsession but, there's just something empowering about great weapons. The finesse and agility of a well seasoned great weapon fighter is pure art. Aggressive and blood thirsty art.

I haven't had much success at training with great weapons until recently, I did play around a bit in the past but nothing too in depth. Today, I fought with my spear and it was epic (from my point of view, at least). I realise that this is just the beginning and that I'm very clumsy and still learning how to hold my weapon, but it felt good. I know that this journey is going to be a very long and very hard one and that's what draws me to it. Easy is not fun. It's not as rewarding. I like how aggressive and how personal great weapon fighting can be. I like how demanding it is. This path will also teach me patience and pacing. It will force me to have a healthier lifestyle. I've already started to go to the gym in order to up my cardio and build strength. I'm changing my diet, adapting to what my body needs.
I've been seeing a chiropractor 2-3 times a month and been getting active release. That alone is a pretty amazing feat. I feel strong and I'm ready to get stronger. It's funny how one hobby can become a lifestyle and how a lifestyle can force you to own your life back and kick your fears in the junk.

Double Awesomeness

A lot has happened in the last few weeks. I feel that I've grown (at least inside... still very much vertically challenged).

 I saw a doctor for my various injuries. Got some things put back into place. It was challenging but I'm happy that I had no panic attack and was quite comfortable with him. This is a huge milestone for me. To have a doctor physical handle me and control my body never went well in the past. Never. Either me or him/her ended up hurt and I usually end up restrained in some way or another. So that was a big step towards vanquishing my demons. It's all for fighting, I need to keep telling myself that I'm letting the doctor touch me to help me heal so I can learn how to fight.
Everything. Is. About. Fighting.

I went to the practice down in Borealis, it was epic. Got two moments where all came together. Two separate instances where my brain decided to understand. One is awesome, two is freaken apogee. I haven't had one of those moments in months. It's awesome to still be able to learn and understand even without fighting. Although, I still wish I could've fought but.. being mature about this and not even sorry!

 In the last few years, I had a good amount of people ask me why I fight. Why I keep going back. Today was a perfect example of why. Some things were taught, some words were exchanged, some lessons were given and aside from the actual fighting bits, I will use everything I've learned today in my everyday life. This is why I fight. For the very selfish reason that it gives me strength to go through everyday things.
 Fun is also a big part of it, I admit.

Lessons Learned

Got home from Borealis a few hours ago. I haven't been this sore in a loooong while. But this is the good kind of sore. There's a bit of injury sore but a lot of good fighting sore. It's been a while since I fought this much. I stopped when my body told me to armour down, but my head still wanted to fight. I listened to my body (for once). I've learn so much. Not only fighting techniques but also a couple of good pep talks that helped me get my mind in the right place.

The first lesson I need to work on is patience. I need to give myself time to learn. Time to understand. Time to heal. I need to stop comparing myself to people who learned how to fight when I was learning how to walk. I can't learn something today and expect to master it yesterday. Once I manage to get that through my skull, things will get better.

I need to work on movement. That's a work in progress, been working on it for a year. But something clicked this weekend. It's clearer. Much clearer. When this becomes a habit, power generation will be easier.

Power generation. Closely related to movement. I've been told that some of the shots I thought were light were actually pretty decent. The opponent's armour will greatly affect how I feel how the shot landed. I feel a bit stupid that it took me that long to learn this but.. Now I know. But still, most of my shots are light and I've taken notes on a couple of drills that will help me generate power.

Gaging. I was always strongly suggested, as a newish fighter, to take every shot and let my opponent decide if it's good or not. That's stopping today. I will gage myself instead of letting others gage me. I know that I will not become thick, and if I do end up on that path, I know that I will have "the talk". 

Overall, I'm proud of how I fought this weekend. A lot of mistakes but with most mistakes came feedback and lessons that will help me get better. I'm more and more confident that I can do this. I will achieve my goals. I used to think it was an arrogant thing to say, but now I think it's a good thing. Having goals and believe in them shouldn't be a bad thing. I will break my walls.

Settling in

We have arrived to our new home a few weeks ago. This province is beautiful. I thought British Colombia was nice, but there's just something about Alberta that's extra special. Although I miss the ocean, the landscape here is hard to beat. I like learning about our new home. I know very little about the history and culture of this province and I'm quite ashamed of that, but that's how it goes when you're raised in a xenophobic, cry baby province. But it's also my fault for not taking the time to educate myself about this part of my country.

Even if I was given the thumbs up to fight from my doctor in Victoria, it looks like my shoulder wasn't really healed. But that's ok, I won't let that get to me, I'll work around the injury and I might even take the plunge and go under the knife. Scares the living shit out of me, but nothing gets between me and my fighting. If all fails, I'll be a shieldless shield maiden and find a different fighting style.

I went to Quad war. Met some pretty amazing people and reconnected with a couple of old friends. It very quickly felt like home. The culture is different here in Avacal. I like it.
The war itself was epic. There was a war scenario that I've never experienced with before and I found it pretty interesting. A boat battle where you have the invaders coming in and the settlers defending. A very period and realistic scenario. I started researching tactics about amphibious assaults and what could have been done differently and what would have been the period tactics. I remember briefly going through that in university so I'm hoping to find my books while emptying boxes.
Fighting in and around a castle was epic. It really adds to the experience.

Last weekend was the crown tournament. I wasn't able to fight due to my shoulder. I inspired. It was very strange to be on the other side of the ropes. The only other time I didn't fight crown, I marshalled. I felt restless and useless but I still very much enjoyed myself and I especially loved watching my fighter, Donnan, fight. His first fight was epic and he did great. He was aggressive and didn't backed down. His two other fights were also pretty good. He had very strong opponents who also fought amazingly. I'm proud of him and of how he fought, he did great. I was extremely honoured that Their Majesties gave me permission to inspire in the tournament. Rule says one must be part of the population for a minimum of 6 months to participate in a crown tournament. I'm honoured and thankful for the privilege and was touched by His words during procession.
I finally met my sister! And we had some fun playing Helga ball and making each other fall with tent poles and marshalling staves. We might have hit each other in the head too. I know my head hurt like a bitch on Sunday morning and it wasn't just the stargazer... I think we will give our Knight some grey hair.

I will go to my first practice this coming Sunday. I will take it easy for the sake of my shoulder. I will be mostly working on footwork and precision I think. A good thing about not fighting this past weekend is that I was able to watch a lot of fighting. There's a couple of things that I've seen that I want to try. This will also greatly help me in my A&S project. Some people in Avacal have a different stance from what I'm used to see and I think it helps balance the offensive/defensive factor very well. I'll need to experiment a bit but I think I may have found what was missing in my stance. It also helps that I have some pretty amazing and experienced fighters to talk stick with.

I also need a major tuneup on my armour.

I think the future will be pretty exciting and interesting.

Bra vind i ryggen er best

This is it. In just a few days, we leave for another kingdom.

When I first heard the news, I was sad. It felt like running into a wall at full speed. I didn't want to believe it. Part of me believed that An Tir, or at least Tir Righ, would be my forever home. 

I realized fast enough that being sad wouldn't change anything and that my only option was to stop whining and make the most of it. So I did. Now, I'm looking forward to find settlement in this brand new kingdom. Yes, I will miss my friends, but those that were meant to stay friends will and the others will move on. New friendships will be built and new ties made. I'm not one to turn down new adventures and new challenges. Bring it on.

I know that everything will change when it comes to fighting. With my husband home, I'll have more time to spend on training and I'm planning on putting full priority on that. I've lost a year due to two injuries and I have the intention to re-learn everything and adapt to my new limitations. I have no I intentions of giving up and who ever feels like stopping me better be ready to meet his Gods.

Something I'm looking forward to is snow. I haven't seen real snow in seven years. I missed it.

My next entry will be from the other side of the mountains. My journey continues.

Bra vind i ryggen er best

A fair wind at our back is best. 

From sheep to loom part 2

Hrútr was clean and dried and I bought some wool cards and wool combs. After a bit of research, I figured out that it's more likely that 8th-10th century scandinans used combs instead of cards but I'm still not entirely sure that they resembled the ones I bought.

None the less, I continued experimenting.

I loaded up my new combs with a bit of wool.

I took my time for this part. I'm still in a splint so instead of holding the comb in my left hand, I've put it under my thigh. I came close a few times to rip my leg open, but it's all part of the fun, right?

Wonderful grey cloud of fluff

It became a wonderful grey cloud of fluff! It was very pleasant to touch. Hard to believe that this fluffy grey cloud used to be so oily and dirty and.... Well... Sheepy. It's also very cool to see the colours blend. I purposely loaded my comb with white and black wool to see what it would do.

I didn't feel like stopping there so I took Hrútr for a spin. It was my first time using this spindle, my other spindle already has a project on it. It took me a bit to figure out how to use one with the whorl at the top. That reminds me, I'll have to research what kind of spindles were used...

It was very fun to spin! I was surprised how robust the yarn turned out to be. 

I'm really happy with how today's experiment went. I'll comb the rest of the small washed batch and I'll spin it.

I'll try to end up with different shades without using any dyes. I'll play with the hues of the fluff. Once I'll have enough, I'll warp and weave.

From sheep to loom part 1

So I'm starting to be very interested in textile and all that's related to it. I have this idea of trying weave something the most period way possible.

I'm at the learning, trial and error step.
I bought the shearing (I named it Hrútr), I believe it's from a Jacob sheep. I'll play with it a bit, try different methods for every steps.
Once I'm done practicing, I'll try to get my hand on a Gutefår shearing. If I can't, I'll substitute with a Orkney, Hebridean or Shetland.
I will card some of Hrútr's shearing but I still need to research on evidence of carding between the 8th and 10th century in Scandinavia and the Danelaw when I start the real project.
I'll try to grow some dye stuff, especially madder, weld, heather and woad.
After that, I'll use my soapstone spindle. I still need to research on how thin or thick yarn was spun.
For the weaving part, I'll build a period loom. As much as I looooove to weave on my inkle looms, it's not period. I'll also make a set of cards especially for that project. loom and cards will be built with modern tools kept to a minimum.
I will weave using a pattern based on a period trim. Most likely something from Birka.

If all this works, I might re-do it a third time but polish it, document it properly and enter it in a A&S competition some time.

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That being said, here's the adventure of Hrútr

Hrútr being all dirty

First soak
(using shampoo for now..
will research what was use in period)

After the first soak.

He's now at his 3 soak, getting cleaner and cleaner!!